claydols: im trying to be more positive *sheds electrons and becomes highly unstable*
immiqrant: YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS VIDEO
at least when you are hanging out with yourself, you get to pick the music
maliciousmelons: i hate when i cant tell if someone is human or if theyre dancer
whoaajulieee: really-shit: If your phone gets wet, try putting it in a bag of dry rice. At night, the rice will attract Asians who will fix your electronics for you Omfg
reggiesloth: i liked your selfie because i want to fuck the life out of you
neurocyte: i can’t believe obama was the first black hokage
i want to meet myself from someone else’s point of view
foodtrucker: I was born at an incredibly young age
lippsticklesbian: I want to give you everything you want. No matter how insane it might seem, I want you to have it. I want to be able to know at the end of the day, I put that smile on your face. But sometimes, when you want something, life has a tendency to say “sorry, no”. Even so, I am going to try to be perfect for you. I’m striving to expand your happiness and satisfy all your need.
multipack: do u ever go to school confident in what ur wearing and then u actually get there and ur kind of just like wow well this was an awful idea
hannahpooper: how the fuck does sexting even start like “haha ok that’s cool but let’s talk about my dick now”
assistantt0theregionalmanager: pizzaforpresident: I’ve never met a smart person named Ashley I have a friend named Ashley and one time she took the fish eggs from the top of her sushi and put them in a glass of water because she thought they would hatch
coolfatcat: cyberthug13: citgo: i remember this kid for suspended for jacking off in the back of french class in 9th grade he was suspended for touching his oui oui god dammit
fatwink: sext me in mla format
kradicalthoughts: m-ignon: dreamboatsandtrenchcoats: Instead of saying motherfucker you can just say Oedipus Half of our generation wouldn’t even understand that I think it would be a good way of finding new friends.
mavin-mania: witchdumpling: turtles arent slow What the fuck
pahnem: mercuriesrising: aparticularlygoodfinder: Go to Starbucks. Order coffee for “Prisoner 24601” When they call out your order, jump up and yell “My name is Jean Valjean!” And if the barista replies with “AND I’M JAVERT,” you tip that motherfucker so hard you tip them right over the edge of a bridge you fucking didn’t
australiansanta: im coming out of the closet. i am a shirt. i haven’t been worn in months. this is exciting
[[MORE]]I’m so sorry. Every single one of the people that I know that can do it, do it, but I feel so shitty for not living up to your expectation of me being different than everyone else. You will never look at me the same again, and realizing that makes me feel even more miserable. I wanted to be the boyfriend that all your girl friends envy you for having. I wanted to be the best...
elen-degenerous: and in that moment i swear we were bitch ass niggas
do you ever dislike someone so much that you hate when people are nice to them
dianabaabe: am I in the process of getting attractive or am I stuck like this forever